<--6:31 PM October 28, 2005-->
SO THIS IS THE AFTERMATH........
To the powers that be,
Please I am begging you to help me find the self control I so deperatly need right this very second.
If you don't bestow upon me the power of restraint.
I SWEAR ON ALL THE DARKEST STARS IN THE SKY I'M GOING TO KILL HIM DEAD.
I don't want to hurt him or even knock him unconscience for a few hours.
I'm talking DEAD OR "DED" OR EVEN THE RABBIT KICKED THE BUCKET DEAD.
HE makes me wanna spit fire....
His lapse of judgement just slays me like a big ole dragon.
He makes me wanna do things Bad things.
Years ago if I got this upset i would do destructive things to harm myself.
Funny thing is when I finally learned how to stop hurting myself.
The people I allow in my life hurt me more than I ever did....
It seems like everytime happiness becomes so tangible that i can actually grasp it.
Some one pushes me face first in to a large swimming pool without the water...
I miss my husband............
I miss the family i never had.......
I miss ME............................